The FastDay Forum

I'm off to New Zealand (Auckland) at the end of April for a week with one of my friends. Flights are booked but nothing else is - accommodation etc.

A few weeks after we booked it, my friend said to me that everyone was telling her we would be bored being in Auckland for a whole week and that we should also go to Queenstown while we're there.

She has since suggested we 'grab a seat' on a plane (there is a website that specialises in this) and go to Queenstown for a couple of days in the middle.

I am, um, *dubious* (not sure if that's the right word) about this for a few reasons.

1. As it's Easter it has already cost us $500 for just the flights to Auckland already. I really begrudge paying an extra $300 on top of this.

2. We're only going for a week - how will we be bored?! If we were going for 2-3 weeks I can understand but a week is not long.

3. By having to fly again, in the middle of our holiday, we are essentially losing 1 day out of the 7 at the airport checking in and whilst flying!

The main thing is the money though. I just can't afford it. But my friend is getting slightly touchy about it and I'm feeling bad because it is her holiday too. We're going to end up spending an insane amount on just a one week holiday.. we also have accommodation to book and I know she won't be happy staying in a cheap hotel.

I'm kind of stuck and I feel awkward. I don't want to be that annoying girl always worrying and moaning about money. I know she's my friend so in theory she should understand, but it's not always as easy as that.

What would everybody else do? It's really starting to worry me and holidays are meant to be enjoyable!

We are booking everything together on Friday night. I have a budget of about $750 for the extra flights/accommodation. I hope it's enough.

oh, it seems that it's getting a bit of a pain to marry your expectations! Damn! I reckon you could very happily spend a lot longer than a week in the North Island, are you hiring a car? A week in Auckland itself would be too much though, imho! If you can travel around by car, you could see many things (and I'm sure our kiwi friends could add some stuff) - but Rotorua is a must, do a Maori tour of the geysers and then have a hangi. Heaps of wonderful places to see, Lake Taupo, Mt Ruapehu, all south of Auckland. North of Auckland, the bay of islands & many other gorgeous places. You can also see "Hobbiton" - the recreated set for the Lord of the Rings. The South Island is also absolutely amazing, not so culturally interesting (Maori culture is better in the North Island, IMHO), but if you only have a week, you really don't want to spread yourself too thinly!! There's heaps to do in the North Island, I'd be saving the South Island for another time!

Thanks so much jools.
No we're not hiring a car unfortunately but a lot of places seem accessible by ferrys/trains etc?
Unfortunately though I don't think she is going to budge - once she's got her mind set on something, that's it.

Is it unreasonable for me to say something along the lines of 'I have $700-750 to spend on accommodation/flights. I don't mind if that goes on just accommodation or if we can budget for both by doing it cheaply. But I can't go over that amount.'?

Lil

Hi Lil, I agree with everything Jools said. We also loved our boat trip out to White Island (an active volcano). Queenstown is a lot of fun too but I understand the money thing. You certainly fill in the time in the north alone.

Hi there - with just a week in NZ agree its a bit of a push to add in queenstown, which is truly beautiful but probably the most expensive place to visit here. There are a lot of day trips you could do from Auckland as the others have said - go to waiheke island for the day, or matakana and check out the farmers market on Saturday.

Is it unreasonable for me to say something along the lines of 'I have $700-750 to spend on accommodation/flights. I don't mind if that goes on just accommodation or if we can budget for both by doing it cheaply. But I can't go over that amount.'?

Lil

That sounds well thought out and perfectly reasonable to me. It is NOT reasonable for your friend to expect you to splash cash you don't have!

[carieoates]

There's loads you can do on North Isalnd. Roturora, lake Taupo,, there's so much to do, even go north to the bay of Islands and Russell etc. if you haven't got the money you can't do it. I know the accom can be pretty cheap at the motels but adding in the flight down south will be pricey.

Maybe a pact that this time you'll do north, island then next time do the south .
I'm well jealous by the way. Fingers crossed we will be back Xmas 2015.

Learning to say NO! to your friends and loved ones is hard, but liberating. I would put your foot down and suggest that you do the other island next year. If she is really adamant about going to Queenstown then she can either pay for your ticket herself, or do it on her own. Causing you financial stress is not something a friend should be doing for selfish reasons.

Get the guide book out, make a list of things to do and places to go to and point out that really there isn't enough time to do it all and fit in a day to Queenstown to just land in the plane, spend 4 hours in a taxi to fly back. Queenstown needs a dedicated holiday of its own, not a fleeting visit.

Difficult one @LilsmilerIf you aren't happy to say no to her try as others have said to cajole her with your wish list of venues to visit and maybe to tell her your buget is a good idea as you're of the impression she won't budge. Sue

Oh dear, this is a tricky one but, you should not be bullied into doing, and paying for something which was not part of the original plan. One week away is, as you say, too short a time to fit in extra flights, packing, unpacking etc. I would explain that you did not know that all this was going to be included when you agreed to the holiday and as it is you just cannot afford it. She is the one who is going back on the original plan, NOT YOU, perhaps she needs to be reminded of that? As others have said, there is nothing stopping her taking off on her own and doing whatever she wants to do. Good luck but STICK TO YOUR GUNS

Ballerina x

I agree that vacations can sometimes be difficult. I think I would sit down with her and share with her the money that you have set aside for this trip and once you figure out the hotel and everything you won't have enough to fly again. Maybe together you can go online and see what there is to to do in the place you'll be staying and figure out how you can get around there.

You would need at least a week I n both places, Queenstown is not a suitable place for a short stopover. That should be next years holiday.

I agree with what others have said - I don't think you're being unreasonable. If you can't afford it you can't afford it. If she wants to do it so badly, then let her pay otherwise, if she wants to go on hols with you, then she has to accept that you're just not as flash as she is.

Thanks everyone, you've really helped me.

I will be putting my foot down.

Lil