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Benefits & Side Effects

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...depending on whether you're on your way up or down?

I am at roughly the same weight now that I was when I stopped 5:2 back in December, but I wasn't really happy with myself because I had hoped to lose more and was disappointed. I felt my weight was on its way "up".

Now, however, having gained another 10+ pounds since then and lost it, I feel like I look fantastic. Maybe I do and maybe I don't but it doesn't matter - I am in control of the situation and I don't feel I'm just on an upward trajectory and there is no end in sight. I have worked bloody hard over the past 3 months and I definitely look different and better than I did then. I feel I can keep going with this and I'm not crying to stop. Does that make sense?
It's all so subjective - I seem to remember a Pinterest thing that said 'I wish I was the weight I was back when I thought I was fat' - may have that wrong but I guess it's just about the fact that it's all relative.

Sometimes when I feel blobby and weigh myself I remind myself that, fully clothed, I still weigh less than I did (naked) when I started this.

You probably do look different - maybe more toned, lost more fat and kept muscle perhaps. Perhaps your clothes fit better. Maybe it is just the feeling of being in control. Weight is such an arbitrary number, we shouldn't use it to direct how we feel about ourselves. Now if only I could take my own advice!!
The last time I was this weight was a after a long and sustained effort to lose weight for a family wedding. I got down to this weight 6 months before the wedding, and it was all uphill afterwards, I put on weight for the wedding. Looking at the photo's of around that time, I do look better now in the mirror, but I bet if a photo was taken of me now it wouldn't look any different. But who cares, I feel great about my weight loss and healthy with it. I also feel that I could do this forever.
One of the things I never got over from my anorexia days long long ago is my distorted perception of size. I'm always shocked when I see pictures of myself. Somehow the mirror is kinder. Or some mirrors anyway...
Perhaps all the exercise is making the difference mummybunny? That is, if it's new to you anyway. I also feel the same. Could be for me that I feel more in control than I did when I did my one and only other diet which was weight watchers. Counting points every single day and having to say no to cakes and chocolate was horrible. And it has been a revelation that I didn't need to up my exercise to lose weight. Onwards and upwards (weight and inch loss!!!!) Xx
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