The FastDay Forum

I was thinking this morning about setting a goal. Lots of people seem to do this. But I felt uncomfortable with it.

Is my weight something I can control? I don't think so.

I can control my eating by sticking to my 500 calories on fasting days and listening to my body on non fasting days so that I only eat when I am hungry and stop eating when I have had enough. These things I can control.

But I can't control the outcome of that behaviour. My body seems to have its own mind about that. Some weeks I lose weight; some weeks I don't. Sometimes a month goes by and the weight bounces up and down. Over 4 months the tendency is down.

It's a bit like the elections. I can't control the outcome. I can do things to try to influence the outcome by getting active, joining the party I favour; attending branch meetings; letterboxing for my favoured candidates; handing out How to Vote cards at polling booths. I can do that. But that may not result in my party getting voted into government. I can't control the Australian people.

I think if I adopt an attitude of acceptance I will be less stressed. Setting a goal implies that I can control the outcome.

I'll just keep on patiently and faithfully following the 5:2 Fast Diet and when the time is right, the weight will drop. My body has its own way of doing it and I can trust that it will be well in the end.

I agree!

Focus on doing your 'fast' days correctly.

Work on anything else when you want to.

Enjoy the ride!

Sallyo, I enjoyed your post with all its common sense approach.
Personally, I keep moving my goalposts for my own interest, as I realise success in the air! It keeps me aware and feeling good about myself.. One does benefit from relaxing about weight loss, as such, so life can go on normally. As you say, if goals are reached while doing the right things, so be it!
I cannot imagine doing anything other than the basic 5:2 and trust in it. (It really works!)

I agree with Simcoeluv, just enjoy the journey. We didn't really control how we put the weight on in the first place!

I belonged to WeightWatchers for a long time, and they always said that a very big long-term goal could be very de-motivating, and they always encouraged small achievable goals such as celebrating when you reached a loss of 5 per cent of your body weight, and then 10 per cent etc.

Also if you take your waist measurements etc, it is far more encouraging to actually measure a loss, however small!

I have got a mini-goal which is to reach waist measurement of 50% height. I am now an inch off that, and it is providing me with some motivation the nearer I get. But I agree with your point about not obsessing over things and taking it one step at a time. We live in a world which is target mad, and it is also quite nice to take things as they come without added pressure. Good luck to all whatever they do.

I would just say that setting a goal and then reaching it does give you a chance to reflect on what is happening to you - and maybe help to avoid anorexic behavior in those predisposed to eating disorders. I set a target initially but having hit it quickly I have taken small steps to achieve a final goal which suits me at present and which I know I can drop below briefly and get back up to with no problem. If I ever manage to build any muscle I will be happy to reset this goal upwards!

I really like the attitude of acceptance, Sallyo - great post. I strive to Go with the Flow in my life - just spotted the contradiction in that sentence - that's where it all goes wrong, I try too hard!

I'd really like to minimise the monitoring as well. I only weigh myself once a week but I'd like to go down to once a month and not allow it to rule my emotions. A bit of weight loss or gain making or ruining my day - that can't be right!

I had 2 goals, one was weight and the other was waist. I reached my target weight after many ups and downs, actually, there were no ups but the downs really took their time and on occasions refused to budge at all for weeks on end. The waist, on the other hand, has been a source of constant angst as I CANNOT make any headway after getting to within one inch of my target size, tough! So close, and yet, seemingly, impossible to reach, so targets? Yes and no!! I think the human mind is programmed to set goals whenever we wish to attain something, getting back into an item of clothing, losing a pre-determined amount of weight, running faster, walking for longer, whatever it is you just can't help setting marker points and it's not such a bad thing as it keeps us focussed on getting us to where we want to be. As long as your goals are reasonable, and flexible if needed, then just go with it and good luck.

Ballerina x

Hi Sally I'm one of those ''goal'' setters My hubby's feelings are the same as yours he says no to put pressure on myself, I really don't believe I am pressuring myself, I came to this program wanting to lose some weight, I've loads to lose my bmi over 44 my main ''goal/target''
Is actually set probably close to 25 lbs lower than recommended weight for my height etc, this goal could if I so wish be moved but I've always said that I believe I'll be very happy to get there.
My mini goals were at each stone along the way ( mini reward)
1st was Haircut/ new style + length
2nd was couple of new tops in the sales.
Healthy bmi ( well dropped down one group so far )
When I get to my 3rd to be truthful it won't matter about the ''treat'' because I've now had to replace ALL my clothing or maybe the treats get bigger ( weekend away ) we'll see WHEN I get there, because I now know I will get there with this amazing WOL
So perhaps is just the fact that I've got an enormous amount of stones/lbs/kilos to shed but it has kept me motivated. Sue

I can't move if I don't know towards where I'm heading...
I need to have a goal, a destination, a target.
Personally, I feel that I actually CAN control the outcome. That's why I've done so many varieties of 5:2, because I wanted to find the best way to take and reach my goal weight.
If I didn't have a goal and I just fasted twice a week, I would have lost 3 or 4 kilos and that would have been it. But I wouldn't be happy with that. I'd be miserable and probably with no will to go on.

I guess it is yet another case of "each to their own". If you can get motivated with no motive then good for you. I simply can't...

Once again, how different we all are, and isn't it great to be able to please ourselves whether we goal set or not!
I like to set 2 monthly goals on my Weightchart.com tracker (and to weigh myself daily) but I don't beat myself up if I dont quite reach the goal.
As long as I'm going downwards overall I'm happy.

I think that if a person has a lot to lose then setting intermediate targets is a good thing. Something like a certain number of kilos until a certain date or lose 10 kilos and then another 10 or get in those wonderful jeans.

Not setting targets is beyond me but on the other hand it does sound stress-free and that can't be a bad thing.

All goals need to be SMART


SPECIFIC
MEASURABLE
ACHIEVABLE
RELEVANT
TIMED

Specific - What do I want to Accomplish?
Measurable - How Much, How May etc
Achievable - How will you do it
Relevant - Is it the right way/time etc
Timed - what time frame will you put on your goal

All can be amended/changed/tweeked, but by having these thoughts in you head as you start out, (almost) anything is possible

I set goals; both short term and long term. But, I never set a deadline for a scale related goal. The fact is that I can control my eating, my exercising, and many other habits. But, the number on the scale is something that isn't in my control. It goes up and down most times without rhyme or reason. So, while I do weigh and I even get a new charm for my bracelet for every five pounds lost...when I set a goal with a deadline it is more along the lines of reaching 15,000 steps every day for 30 days. Or, staying on plan and under 100 carbs every week day for a month. Some others goals I have set along the way involved cutting back on diet soda and getting into a certain pair of jeans or capris before the end of the season.

I know that for me setting up a deadline, as in I will lose 5 lbs this month or I will weigh x amount by Christmas only causes my pain and suffering because when it is all said and done I can only change my habits. I can't make the scale go down exactly the way I want it to or in the time frame that I want it to happen. There are factors beyond my control like my thyroid and hormones that can make the scale very stubborn.

We can control the calorie intake and the calorie consumption in the same way in which we can control the amount of money in our wallets - we can modify our calorie intake and consumption until we get the desired result.

I definitely want to add one kilogramme per week (4:3 and a lot of sports) to a dumbbell that represents my total weight loss. Eleven kilogrammes can be surprisingly heavy! I lift this dumbbell several times a day, satisfied with my progress and eager to add one more iron kilogramme at the end of the week which already waits in the storage room for my appearance on Saturdays. Half a kilogramme per week would not be a problem for my diet dumbbell, there are enough weight plates waiting.

Like you I always failed to influence the outcome of elections with my vote. That is why I acquired the habit of going to a pâtisserie after the vote to make my participation a more rational choice. As elections are always on my 'feed days' 4:3 does not get in the way of this laudable tradition.