The FastDay Forum

@wendyjane so brave of you to update this thread with the news of your mother's passing but how wonderfully you have put it. I am full of admiration and words cannot express it so I leave it there

@WendyJane my condolences to you. Thank you for starting this thread and sharing your personal and final journey in caring for your mom. I'm lost for words .... I'm deeply touched. You have helped me reflect on my journey ahead and I thank you for that. One of my best loved posts on the forum is your story of your brother, mom and you navigating the airport rules, family silver and a very unhappy Hercules the cat. Diamond memories.

Edit: must change my avatar it's making me dizzy and I'm sure irritating the pants of everyone...........

Thanks, @Lizbean, you're so kind to point me in this direction. From reading some of the posts, many of you are doing a lovely job caring..how wonderful you are.

@LadanTrying you are welcome, it's good to have a place to come to when needed. Thinking of you today.

@Lizbean, I'm still enjoying your avatar. Fastday is better than TV these days with all the live action - green smilies in particular! I'm glad you liked the airport story. I'll be laughing about that one, and retelling it, for the rest of my life, certainly.

And you reminded me that I left out an important part of my final chapter post. Hercules has been adopted by my daughters, who live 45 minutes from us. He is quite content, and they love having him.

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Thank you @Wendyjane for telling us your story. I'm sorry your family and your Mom had to go through this, but glad that she is at rest now.

Thanks, @Lizbean, you're so kind to point me in this direction. From reading some of the posts, many of you are doing a lovely job caring..how wonderful you are.

Just a quick update--thanks for all the well wishes, once Mum is back awake I can't wait to tell her about how all of these kind souls who don't even know her sending good thoughts and lighting candles.

Mum's bypass surgery was done around midday and unfortunately her blood pressure was very low and so she had to undergo a second surgery to correct two points where she was bleeding out. Ended up being quite a long and worrying day for all of us

But once she had the second procedure things seemed to normalise quite wonderfully and she was in better shape. Luckily she was completely out for all of this and should not feel too many long term effects from having a second surgery.

Anyways, back in today... hopefully she'll be awake a bit alert today. I could only hold her hand yesterday.

Hi @Ladantrying - I'm not sure where you live in our global timeline. I hope all is well with you and thanks for your post.
How was your day? And how is your lovely Mum?
I hope all is good today.
Liz

Hello @ladantrying I saw your update on todays fasting thread. I hope all went well today and your Mum is comfortable and recovering. You must be exhausted, will you get chance to rest?

Tomorrow afternoon I travel to visit my parents for the weekend. I spoke with my Mum this evening to take her regular online shopping order and she appeared to be very confused. No shopping list and she was also sitting in the study in dark, the light bulb had gone. So it's time to review the management plan with the carers who pop by in the morning. That means I have cancelled all work meetings on Monday so I can assess and put in place if necessary. Mum's also due an outpatient hernia treatment on Tuesday. We have assessed the post surgery care - can't believe they have scheduled her with speaking with us to make sure the right home care is there and in place.
I feel very dizzy but I'm looking forward to seeing Mum and Dad tomorrow. x

@Wendyjane, I'm so very sorry about your mum. Sounds like you have a wonderful family.

@Lizbean, I think yesterday was a bit of progress in that mum seemed to be coming around but unfortunately she still can't breathe on her own yet. They sedated her again so she could rest as she was not comfortable at all with the breathing tubes, etc. For the short while she was 'awake' (I use that term liberally as it was just more semi-conscious!) she and I were engaged in an arm wrestling match with me trying to keep her hand down from pulling out the horrible tubes they'd got down her throat. I felt like I was complicit in torture! But I keep telling myself 'she won't remember this'. Back to the hospital a bit later today... the hope is that she'll be awake again, and that her oxygen levels will have improved sufficiently to let her breathe on her own without that horrible apparatus. I saw lots of other patients on the CICU who seemed to improve quite quickly as soon as they got rid of that horrible breathing thing.

Oh and @Lizbean, I'm so sorry that you are having such a time with your parents and the care providers not actually explaining what is going on. I think we're woefully compartmentalised here in the UK sometimes, despite having such a generous and wonderful health service. My son has Marfan Syndrome and we spend time at about 6 different hospitals/specialists regularly. The hospitals don't communicate with each other so I end up having to be the point of contact and information for the other clinicians that he sees. I keep saying that I, as his mother and a non-clinician, should not be the respository of all knowledge or be the one who is logically joining up the dots in his care.

Hello @Ladantrying
Very best wishes to you, your Mum and your family. That is a very tough week with the snow too. ..... how is your Mum, is she recovering well.
Day by day I say
Edit: just back from seeing my elderly parents this weekend. London to Lancashire trip.
Edit 2: I promise to change my avatar this week, it's driving me bonkers. x

Hello @Ladantrying
Very best wishes to you, your Mum and your family. That is a very tough week with the snow too. ..... how is your Mum, is she recovering well.
Day by day I say
Edit: just back from seeing my elderly parents this weekend. London to Lancashire trip.
Edit 2: I promise to change my avatar this week, it's driving me bonkers. x

Hiya @LizBean, whereabouts in Lancashire? A lot of my family is there, too. Long trip up from London, though!

Sadly my mum's nowhere near better yet--it pains me to have to report this after almost a week. After the second surgery she developed a really bad chest infection (which I now believe is pneumonia) and is still under and unable to breathe on her own. It's been a really long week, if I'm honest! All these other patients seem to pop into the CICU for a day after their surgeries and make wonderful recoveries and my poor mum is still fighting to come back to us. On a positive note (trying to stay positive here), she's definitely recovering well on the heart side of things, so if the antibiotics can do their job she'll hopefully start to come around soon. Definitely been a case of day by day... the problem was the second surgery... shocking how that's pushed her so far back, recovery wise.

running out of things to be positive about here...

Hi @Ladantrying
My parents live north of Preston. I have a sister in Newborough and a sister in Kent though she is currently spending the winter in Spain. I also have family in West Bradford and surrounding area. Wouldn't it be strange if we had a connection somehow!
I'm so very sorry to hear your Mum's recovery has not been as expected but it sounds from what you say the medics are on it as best they can and I hope that gives you some comfort as you continue to move forward.
So I'm wishing you and your Mum positive vibes through the forum to help keep your positive spirits going forward tomorrow.
Digging deep for you.
Best wishes
Liz

Hi @Ladantrying @Manderley
How are you today? It's a bumpy road for me at this time, one day ok the next is not.
Thanks to @wendyjane for sharing and leading her journey. Very much appreciated by me.
All will be good.
Lizx

I hope all our carers are well today.
Our journey is drawing in. The indications over the last 10 days lead us to the sad realisation our father is slowly dying a natural death. He is sleeping all the time, can’t be woken and has lost interest in eating. I’ll see him this coming weekend or before if he calls me. We have requested the GP visit tomorrow. One never knows, it could be weeks. That’s where I am today.
Knowing my Dad (Richard) he will hang in there as long as he can to be with Mum
@Sassy1 @Manderley with you soon x

Thinking of you all, and hoping for some peace in your lives - @Lizbean, @Sassy1, @Manderley and any others going through this.