The FastDay Forum

No not That Girl (see below), or @ThatGirl. That girl who says "no, I couldn't possibly eat that." I've always kind of hated that girl, or been annoyed by her anyway. BUT NOW I AM HER, in my head at least. As in, I very often think "no, I couldn't possibly eat that" rather than voicing it. I said this to a friend recently, that I was becoming that girl. She said, oh like *name of mutual thin friend*. YES. like her. She also happens to be my thin person mentor. The one who seems to keep weight off effortlessly, only the deeper you look, the more you realize it's not effortless

What I'm realizing, slowly, is that I kinda have to be that girl in order to maintain the weight loss I worked so hard for. Maybe not 100% of the time, but most of the time. Usually it's not so hard - I have a sweet tooth, but it can usually be satisfied with a bit here and there. But sometimes…

Worse than having to turn down food, or invitations to eat out (sure this WOE is flexible, but if you do 4:3 or ADF, not *that* flexible) is the constant obsession about food. I hope this passes. It isn't good. And while it feels sort of necessary now, I hope it won't always be necessary.

[carieoates]

Chin up Maryann.
Talking about these things is like therapy for us girls, it's the boys I feel sorry for, do you see them here, no. Do you hear them saying "I couldn't possibly eat that"
I say I can't eat that today I will save it for tomorrow. But I haven't got a sweet tooth so i suppose I'm lucky
That's a lovely pic by the way.

Thanks, @carieoates! That is Marlo Thomas, star of 60s/70s TV show That Girl!

Ooh, I've never thought about having a thin person mentor! There are people I know who never fluctuate and are slim...but I tend to look at them and think "don't they have any emotions?" I also assume they have wonderful lives - how else do they manage not to reach for the biscuits/chocs in times of stress?

Obviously, my thinking is way off-beam. But then, that's classic comfort eater behaviour. I totally agree with @carieoates - this forum is the best therapy. It's great to get other people's perspective on so many things...

Keep it coming please!

To keep the weight off I have to remain quite vigilant most of the time. I don't enjoy a rigid 500 cal day so try to avoid it if I can by skipping the odd meal here and there. However, if I do weigh above my self-imposed weight limit I know a day of fasting will set it right. Good luck in finding what works for you.

Good to see a photo of That Girl after your mention the other day

Worse than having to turn down food, or invitations to eat out (sure this WOE is flexible, but if you do 4:3 or ADF, not *that* flexible) is the constant obsession about food. I hope this passes. It isn't good. And while it feels sort of necessary now, I hope it won't always be necessary.

Ah, the transition from white-knuckle to a more relaxed style of maintenance. Some people seem to manage this really well (thinking of several maintainers here who seem to gain 7 lbs and then lose it with a couple of FDs) and others of us, well, it's watchful vigilance and learning when to react and what to let run. I strongly believe that levels of stress influence our attitude to our WOE and schedule, and how easily, or not, we respond with laying down fat.

I'm fortunate in that I don't have to contend with obsession about food tho' from people's comments, it seems debilitating and distressing. The temptations of socialising are great, particularly when you're with people whose idea of good hospitality is to persuade you and eat and drink more. But, the benefits of socialising are tremendous (see quality of life and stress)...

I'm fortunate in that I don't have to contend with obsession about food tho' from people's comments, it seems debilitating and distressing. The temptations of socialising are great, particularly when you're with people whose idea of good hospitality is to persuade you and eat and drink more. But, the benefits of socialising are tremendous (see quality of life and stress)...

Socializing around food and drink is a weakness of mine. I'm a big believer in food bringing people closer together and of course a little booze doesn't hurt. There was a study that showed that chimps (I think) sharing food with one another tested for increased oxytocin, the bonding hormone. If that's true for us humans, there is a reason we are drawn to it.

And That Girl? I've always admired people like that for their willpower because surely they want to bury their face in and eat their way out of the cake/pie/potatoes/cheese like I do.

To keep the weight off I have to remain quite vigilant most of the time.

Like @Wmr309 I have to be vigilant to stay within my happy weight range. While I am relatively new to 5:2 and my motivation is to repair digestive issues and long term health benefits I am an old hand at weight loss having lost and regained large amounts 3 times, not including 2 pregnancies, before finally losing and keeping the weight off.

I reached my goal weight in November of 2002 but the last 12 years haven't all been smooth sailing. When I have taken my eye of the ball, and I have a number of times, the weight comes back on quickly. 5kg (11lbs) takes just 1-2 weeks but losing it takes 1-2 months.

I've certainly noticed that weight maintenance became more challenging once I reached my 40's and that my ability to manage treats diminished. Whereas once upon a time having a packet of crisps and a relaxed meal every fortnight had no effect. Now it's either a bag of crisp or a relaxed meal not both.

In some ways I am food obsessed. I've made particular dietary choices that mean that I always think ahead when it comes to food, pack lunches every work day and for dinners mostly eat at home making just about everything from scratch. Food preparation takes some time as I prefer to avoid processed and convenience foods but I wouldn't have it any other way.

I think about food, cooking and nutrition all the time but have learned that while it may be interesting to me it isn't to most other people so it's usually just my husband and best friend who get to hear me gab on. At first I thought it was unhealthy but I've come to accept it and now see it as a positive that has helped me stay on track for more than a decade.

All the best @MaryAnn. I hope you embrace being that girl

I'm in maintenance, but still feel I need to be constantly vigilant. I still do 4:3 and count calories on non fast days. The only time I let myself totally off the leash, is on holiday. I was on holiday last week and put on 7lbs. After 2 fasts I'm already down just over 4lbs, but realistically it will take me another 3 or so weeks to get back to my pre holiday weight.

I usually fast on a Saturday, but this week have been invited to a friend's coffee morning, where I know there will be lots of cake. My dilemma is whether to abandon the fast, try to be good and refuse all cake (maybe take a couple of bits home to have Sunday) or have those couple of bits of cake and just have a 'low' day. I'm under target, but above what I consider to be my comfortable weight. But I'm already agonising over the decision, when I know logically that I shouldn't worry about it - so what if it takes me a couple of extra weeks to shift those extra couple of pounds.

Very interesting thread - I can relate to everything said.

Well done, @MaryAnnon turning into 'That Girl". Who would have thought it? I love food, but I don't want to obsess about it either. And I will NEVER count calories on non-fast days. That for me is the whole point of 5:2. I am re-learning to count them on fast days and that's as much calorie counting as I am prepared to do. But, like you, I do say, 'I can't eat that', about certain foods. I don't eat food just because it's there anymore. And certainly I am much better at saying 'I've had enough, even though this food is really delicious.' These are really important developments.

I guess it is reassuring??? that many of us share the same challenges. Which is probably why we have weight management issues in the first place...

I do admire the (what seems like) more relaxed attitude of Sallyo and StowgateResident, among others. Maybe such an approach would make it easier for me to stop eating when I am satiated?? I still can't work out why I keep eating when I am not hungry, given I am so well aware of the many consequences of doing so. I guess it is partly related to "comfort" in its broadest sense, though it certainly does not bring comfort. And I certainly can't find a strategy that works to stop this behaviour.

I wonder if personality type may have a bit to do with what strategies work easily and which don't?

As carieoates infers, talking about things is certainly good therapy. But sometimes I think I use posting in this forum as an alternative to actually changing the behaviour that I need to change.

Anyway, I have ruminated for far too long over this post, so will now post it!

I'm interested by people's comments. I think that it is pretty tedious and boring to have to think about food intake all the time, but unfortunately I think that I may have to start doing it. Although I have generally been eating only one meal a day for a number of months now, and have not been going crazy, I find that I am slowly gaining weight. I find that quite grim. I haven't been counting calories and I've been lightening up on my intake of complex carbohydrates, but I have been eating sensibly, with nothing in excess, and minimal amounts of sweet foods. I'd estimate that I've eaten in a one hour window for 90% of the time. It all seems rather cruel.

I am disappointed that I will need to be stricter on myself, but it looks like that will have to be the case. I'm starting to ensure that I have two 500 calorie days amongst my usual eating windows, and I'll see how that pans out.

@Hazelnut20, I had a boss (female) who LOSES WEIGHT when she's stressed; during our busy season, she'd actually lose weight (probably a size 3/4, sigh). As she was surrounded by us fatties, I told her once she was risking her life, complaining about losing weight without meaning to! I will say, while she was mindful about what she ate--didn't eat a lot of junk or garbage--she wasn't obsessed with eating low cal either. For example, we used to be close to an incredible bakery, where I'd go get a warm, fresh out of the oven, loaf of potato bread...we'd snarf that down! And she ate her share of chocolate...Although she does eat those (icky!) Lean Cuisine things; I can't choke those down myself.

Oh man, I used to be that girl. I accidentally lost about 40 lbs when writing my thesis. People started bringing me food they were so worried. I stopped being that girl a long time ago!