The FastDay Forum

[Tracieknits]

Your sister -- well I think your dad knew a thing or two about her when he made his will. You need to stick to his wishes and tell her to stop. Coupez l'herbe sous ses pieds. Don't let her talk to you that way! Tell her that if you have to sell now, she has to take the dog. Otherwise, maybe you could move to your parents' house and live there, at least until your mother dies. Then, your sister won't have to worry about it not being fair that you get anything before your mother passes.

Hi honey *waves*, just catching up after grandchildren explosion!
Sounds like Life is moving along for you, Time has a way of sorting things through, all shall be well :0)
Lots of good suggestions coming from everyone, I'm sure your Dad knew what he was doing with his Will and would expect his instructions to be complied with, it's not your sisters' call.
Hug those furry friends from me, dogs can be pretty noisy can't they!
{{{+}}}

Great to see you back Manderley xxx

Just a thought @Manderley but in England people make quite a good living out of walking other people's dogs.

Good to see you back Manderley. Wishing you lots of luck in getting your life sorted out. xx

Hi Manderley. Yes, I'll have to move. If I stay in Japan, which is not likely, it will be less complicated, though finding an apartment that allows pets may be tricky. If I move to Europe or the US, it's doable, but a little complicated. My mom has already said she can take them in temporarily if I need her to. But I still worry, like any cat mommy would.

Welcome back Mandelay. Hope things continue to sort themselves out. One day at a time.

Today is my first fast of the week. I have no idea if there will be only this one or if I will be able to manage another one or even, why not, 2. The thing is, I never plan a fast, I always go with my instinct. If I am hungry when I wake up, which happens from time to time, I don't see the point on going starving all day long. I will be stressed out, irritated and it will be the longest day ever as I won't be able to go to sleep before 2:00 AM..... We could say I try to listen to my body but, even after 2 years, I still have a lot to learn about that.

Saturday was my dad's birthday. You can imagine how stressful it was..... I hope it will get "easier" with time... I finally rang my godfather and the conversation was a lot weird. He was really emotional and asked me some really personal question like if I have somebody in my life, a partner. Who asks that ? We talked for more than an hour and it was really difficult to say goodbye, in fact we said goodbye for 5 minutes.... I was sure that all I felt in March/April was only because of the loss but now, I am not sure. It was so weird to talk to him, how he reacted. I guess we'll see....

I am still with my actual partner but, as I explained to JL, my godfather, it's complicated. I know now that it's finished with my partner, and it is finished since my dad's death, but I too coward to face the music and leave him. How do I know it's finished ? Well, he did some stupid stuff like making a scene in the restaurant we ate only several days after my dad's funeral. The scene was, and it a biggie, because I was not smiling enough to his liking and, poor thing, was so stressed out, he didn't deserve that...... Also I discovered that he is a "holier than thou" kind of guy. If you don't have the same opinions of taste as he does, you don't know what you're talking about. So, you see, to have someone who is interested in what I have to say, who asks questions and, actually, listen to the answers, is quite a big thing....

I put on a bit of stress weight for a while but I have lost all of it since then. I still have some issues like the hemorroids thing that bugs me for quite some tim now but other than that, and that my skin and hair are horribly dry, it's fine. Just one thing, though, when I can't eat anything before dinner. And it has to be liquid or it can be really really bad. Chewing release a monster in me that can get easily out of hand........

As you can see, it's still a big mess in my tiny head

Great to see you back @Manderley.

Sorry to hear you have been through such a rough time - hopefully things will improve for you now.

Sending big hugs from England (and tea bags if you PM me your address!)

You still have alot going on there Manderley. I'm sorry to hear about your partner on top of everything else. Take you time - it's been a difficult year for you.

Hello,
I'm so rooting for you!

Gosh my diet is bad these days..... I can't help but eat cheese and pasta (with green veg and grilled white meat, all is not bas, thankfully). On my non fast days I need to have some kind of comfort food and keeping the right balance is not always easy. I have 3 treats I can choose from. Britanny biscuits, great quality milk chocolate and sweets. I have the right to choose one of them every day so it will be 2 biscuits or 1 chocolate square (it's a thick square so it's like 2 normal squares) or 2 sweets. I couldn't not have something sweet to finish my day, I need that taste in my mouth, I can't finish my dinner with something salty. I can't explain it. It's not the same when on a fast day. Most of the time I will have a soup, around 1l of it, so I am pretty full at the end of the day and won't think about it.

I won't go on a scale, for now. The reason is simple, I know I am slightly underweight and I know if I go on that scale, I will hyper focus on it and it will become a source of stress and obsession and I don't need that right now. I try to eat regularly and cut alcohol by half in the last 2 months. Not that I was an alcoholic by any means, I fall asleep after 2 glasses of wine, but I needed a drink from time to time, and I hate to put "need" and "drink" (meaning alcohol) in the same sentence. The funny thing is it's not the alcohol that was difficult to cut, it was the salted biscuits you eat with it. Especially some italian biscuits made with olive oil, they taste heavenly and they are my weakness...... The next step is to find some new cheap recipes to change from the ones I tend to do over and over and over again....

@MaryAnn How is your situation and how are your furry babies ?
Boo is still on the top of her mountain, for 5 months now, even if there is a little progress (I can put her 70 cm lower than the top of the wardrobe from time to time, but she still can't go on the floor with the rest of us when Happy is here) and it's a bit worrying for Happy's future with us..... I can't have Boo living on the top of that wardrobe for the rest of her life, it wouldn't be fair for her and even for Happy...

@rawkaren, I don't know if it's him or him who changed when my dad died. Maybe he was like that all along and I didn't notice because he was the only one for me. The minute I saw JL (my godfather), it changed everything. There was that thoughtful man who was there in the most difficult time of my life, someone I can talk to, panic with, and who was the only one to come and comfort me just before they closed the coffin. Without a word he just took me in his arms and was just there. You see, it's not just now that I fancy him, it's not because of the grief, I fancy him since I was 12 years old, so for nearly 3 decades. I even kept the camera he gave me at that time, which doesn't work for years, but it was my first one and, most of all, it was from him. We didn't see each other for years because he mas married to a crazy woman so I don't even know 2 of his children who were born after I cut all ties with him. At that time I did it because of what I felt, which didn't seem normal to me. Know..... Well, I don't know, really. I wrote him a mail and my best friend told me "if he has some feelings he will read between the lines, but it's not too obvious so just wait and see". I don't wait for anything, I don't think that, even if there is something there he will make a move and it's fine by me. I just wanted him to know how important he is to me. I know it's crazy. So, why staying with my partner then ? Well, I dread going back to the dating scene and he's not too bad, I just don't love him, that's all. It's not like we were married or living together.

This afternoon I go to my parents' house to empty a room. I am still working on how to do it it seems to go on forever and I can't seem to finish a single room.....

So, I've been thinking.... Bad news, I know....

First, I have decided to go "out there", to the world and to keep in touch with people, even if the social thingy is not my strong suit. So, I will have a google + (I prefer that to Facebook, don't ask me why) which will be shared with friends, familly and it will be in French and in English. That should be fun, shouldn't it ?

I tried to find where to put the link in my settings but couldn't find it so, if you want to come, here it is
[url]google.com/+SandrineLavaine1974[/url]
No post yet, I am a beginner after all, but later today there sure will be one


The other thing is, to spice things up a bit, I have decided on a kind of challenge, go full IF for a month. It's not to lose weight but to gain some discipline. I tend to put things to tomorrow or the day after and it needs to change. I need to stop finding excuses and to move on. So it will start tomorrow and I will fast monday, wednesday, friday and sunday.

Who says I am a bit excessive ?

The first fast of this IF week went really really well. I was busy all day, working at my parents' house nearly all day and I drank plenty of water, and 3 black coffee. I couldn't even finish my chinese soup tonight and ate a little more than half of it so I am way less under the 500 cal of a "traditional" fast.

Next one will be wednesday. I plan to be really busy that day as well as, to fast, doesn't slow me down

As if fasting every other day this week was enough of a challenge, I decided to push a little bit more....

Dance was my first love. I did some pretty intense dance lessons (take and later even give) between the age of 3 and 18. It was a lot of hours a week, mostly during the weekend, 4h30 on Saturdays and about the same time on Sundays, before I had enough at 18 and wanted a social life. For a few days now, I am listenning to a lot of music, and I mean A LOT, I put some of the pieces on my google+ page, and here there was that crazy idea to go back to dance. It would be a perfect exercise as it makes all your muscles work, I use to love it so no motivation issue and I have a few pals who are willing to do something together. Not taking lessons, more doing that ourselves as we all use to go to the same practise. The funny thing is that, even after more than 20 years, the body has a fantastic memory and it's as I never stopped really, everything is here, the movements, how to create and teach a routine. It may be the discipline I crave as it really builds body and spirit and I don't believe that fasting will be an issue. I will take my water and some home made ice tea (with mint green tea) and everything should be fine.

Most of all, I am really really really excited at the idea of going back to that first love. Does that show ?