The FastDay Forum

Hi Smart/Clever peoples!

I have been labelled by my husband numerous times as an "All or Nothing girl"....

And he is right - this is especially evident in the way I just throw myself into new projects/hobbies - total immersion.

And it's evident in the way I eat... a whole bag of crisps, not just a delightful handful.

And here I am now, revisiting IF (5 years ago I gave it a go but was dismal failure) and it seems like another "All or Nothing".

Fasting from dinner to dinner 3 days a week.

So what I want to know is – is it possible to stop being all or nothing regarding food, but still find that the IF works?

Is it a personality trait or is it a state of mind/learnt??

I wouldn’t mind knowing if anyone else out there is similar...

It is probably a personality trait. But, probably something you could work on as well! But, everyone has to find whatever works for them. I don't know if you've heard of Gretchen Rubin who wrote the Happiness Project. But she has a whole thing about people being either moderators or abstainers.

Here's one of her posts on it, you might find interesting!
http://gretchenrubin.com/happiness_proj ... moderator/

Although, I have to say that I do think I fall somewhere in between. For example, I do really well if I avoid something all week, but allow it on weekends!

[Debs]

That is a very interesting question as I would say I'm exactly the same. I bought a jar of peanut butter to keep at work to have on crackers; it was gone in two days. Scoffed by the spoonful. I can either abstain completely and fast successfully or stuff myself silly, it depends on my mindset. If I am at work I can't leave something half eaten in the desk, or a tin of nuts semi touched and only nibble occasionally. Perhaps it's something to do with grelin levels. I don't have an off switch, but many people do and they can moderate themselves.
I'll be interested to see how other people are.

Debs

[Tracieknits]

I tend to be that way as well. I get rather "enthusiastic" about things -- which I put in quotes because really, it's a euphemism for bonkers when used here.

BUT I will say that IF has helped me become less "all or nothing" about food. Learning about my body, learning what hunger really is, and learning how little food I require for just basic survival has helped me learn to eat reasonable portions, cut out snacking and be satisfied with less.

I can still sometimes be a bit extreme, but I'm way better than I was 5 years ago

[carieoates]

If "IF" helps with your all or nothing ism then do it. My hubby is just the same. Black and white all, or nothing. And reducing his cals throughout the day till diner is the only way he can lose fat so if it works do it.

Thank you all for your reply to my rather random post! I guess there's not much to be done about a personality trait.

@cblasz - Thank you! I've checked the link - and yes, I'm an abstainer I think! Thanks for that - it helps being less judgmental of self.

You’re a moderator if you…
– find that occasional indulgence heightens your pleasure–and strengthens your resolve
– get panicky at the thought of “never” getting or doing something
You’re an abstainer if you…
– have trouble stopping something once you’ve started
– aren’t tempted by things that you’ve decided are off-limits

@Tracieknits & @carieoats- yes, maybe the IF will be more moderating... but I have not been able to stick to my challenges as per other thread - namely not eating crisps!! ha ha. I guess not getting miserable about it is the key.

@Debs - ha ha - do you have an ultra clean desk like me too??

Hi all

This is an interesting issue. I found the article quite insightful and a reminder to be less judgemental and open to other ways of thinking, but, like others, feel that I can be both an abstainer and a moderator, depending. Maybe at heart I am an "all or nothing" person, but have tried to become more of a moderator - in all aspects of life!!



Edit: After reading the article in the following post, maybe I won't try to be moderate in all things, just where it makes sense...

I'd love to be more moderate. It seems to be a better position to be in rather than swinging from one extreme to another.
Here's an amusing article on moderation - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyl ... g.features

Interesting question, not to difficult to answer in my case. But we could turn this into a little 'know your fellow forum-member' game. So what would you expect me to be: abstainer or moderator?

Hmm @P-Jk, a bit of a dangerous game!!

I think you might be a moderator. You seem to have had few problems losing weight and keeping it off, and only fast when you feel the need. You were very relaxed about everything on your recent holiday, and didn't put any weight on then. All that seems more of a moderate approach than all or nothing.

Not that dangerous I would say @Sassy1.
Having three small meals on a fast day as the only strategy used in 3 and a halve year, so not really fasting (nothing) and having everything in one meal; never for one official measurement outside of my 2 kg. maintenance range; a balance in one of my avatars
I would say it has written 'moderator' all over it.

Interesting to see that you even can have moderator or abstainer versions of IF

Makes me think of a related question. Some abstainers indicated they would like to be a bit more moderate. Any moderators wishing they were a bit more 'all or nothing'?
Not me, sorry, feel too comfortable having 'balance' as a second name

@P-JK - I know my husband wouldn't want to be an abstainer like me.... very happy to be moderator... I doubt anyone wants to be an "extremist" (in the nicest sense). I think balance is probably a preferred state of mind.

[Debs]

Having read that I would classify myself as an abstaining moderator
I can potter along for a few days, resisting temptation with small amounts of choccy, and then I have to, not binge exactly, but go all out on something, almost to get it out of my system. At home we have a large bag of assorted bars of chocolate and I can manage with a small piece daily, at work is a different story though, I can buy a family bar and scoff the lot. My husband is probably a moderating influence here!
It works in the main for me though.

@P-JK - I know my husband wouldn't want to be an abstainer like me.... very happy to be moderator... I doubt anyone wants to be an "extremist" (in the nicest sense). I think balance is probably a preferred state of mind.

Perhaps @wakki22, but life would become a bit boring without at least a couple of nice 'extremists' (in the nicest sense indeed) doing something interesting once in a while.