The FastDay Forum

They say: "Nothing tastes as good as being slim feels" and to a degree that's right. However, I am really concerned about the prospect of falling off the wagon...at some point.

There have been a number of people re-joining the forum of late, who had success previously, then stopped 5:2.....put on weight.....and have now returned.

In a couple of days, it will be my 6 month mini Fastiversary and in that time, I have shed 3 stone (hurrah!) which is fantastic. My mood has rocketed, I am doing more exercise than I have ever done....and the compliments are flowing, which is so lovely! Yesterday, I was in Asda trying on jeans & they had some "magic" ones that mould to fit any shape. I went trotting off to the changing rooms with an "L" (they didn't come in actual sizes) and was thrilled to find that the waistband was way too big...such a buzz. But, even though the evidence was in front of me in the mirror....I still see total thunder thighs and flaws (have always been a pear shape).

Stick with me please...I know I am rambling, but I need some help to understand things! Last week, I bumped into a lady who had been one of my inspirations for starting 5:2. She had done brilliantly....but I hadn't seen her for a long time......and the weight had gone back on

Like many women, I have a history of losing weight & then piling it back on (& then some). My question is: why, when everything is going your way for a change and you look & feel better than you have in ages (not to mention all the health benefits), do we sabotage ourselves??

This worries me no end. I love reading all the success stories and I know the support doesn't end on here once you have reached target....so technically, we should have all the tools we need to maintain a healthy weight. But the returning members speak for themselves...

I went on a mini break with a bunch of girlfriends 2 weeks ago. Did not fast or exercise during that time....and put on 6lbs (alcohol played a part in this, definitely). Since returning, I have really struggled with the notion of getting back on the wagon - even though this WOL is the least restrictive method ever! A little voice keeps saying "Don't go back to fasting yet...time a little more time off!" but I know this would be a very slippery slope. Last year I lost 2 stone 4lbs, was starting to feel fab.....and then jacked it all in - seemingly for no reason, though obviously my psychology played a big part, even if I didn't quite understand why.

So....the $64 million question: how do I stay hungry for better health and becoming a healthy weight....when I can be my own worst enemy?

Would love to hear what you all think.....

Many thanks!

Thank you for posting this, I have been having similar thoughts myself, reading about the struggles of people who had stopped fasting to start again. I wish I had an answer. In a sense I fell off 5:2 but I fell straight into Fast-5 which I am so happy with. I don't have "fast days" in the 5:2 sense so I don't have a little voice suggesting to me to abandon the Fast and try again tomorrow - or, what the heck, next Monday. I just have to get through to 2 without eating and stop eating at 7. Doing the same thing every day plays to my strengths, but what attracts many to 5:2 is that you only have to "diet" 2 days out of 7.

My upcoming challenge is holidaying with a friend who is a bit of a foodie and enjoys punctuating her day with good quality meals and snacks, don't know how being told we can go out for lunch OR dinner will go down!

Hopefully somebody with psychological insights will be along soon.

[carorees]

This is an excellent question and one that I think we need to work hard to find the answers to. The reasons many people give about falling off the wagon with traditional diets is the fact that they cannot eat their favourite foods and/or the difficulty in fitting the diet to their lifestyle. With intermittent fasting we can't really use this excuse! There is a strong biological pressure to put the weight back on, with the neurochemistry in the brain being behind it all, and as well as this brain biochemistry aspect, there is also a psychological aspect. Most likely the balance of these factors varies from person to person.

I think that if you find yourself making excuses or at least trying to think of excuses to skip a fast/not start again after a holiday, it is time to sit down and try to analyse exactly why you are having those feelings.

Here are a few of my thoughts about the kinds of questions you need to ask yourself:
1) Are the fasts really that difficult? If so, would a different fasting method help? Are you undergoing a 'famine effect'...if you are finding fasting much harder than before maybe you need to lighten up a little. One possibility is to change the calorie allowance on fast days so that they seem less daunting until you get your mojo back.
2) Have you set too difficult a target? What about trying a month or two of maintenance...if you know you can maintain your losses so far, perhaps the fear of falling off the wagon will lessen. You can either try to lose more weight later or feel happy that you have lost a little and improved your health.
3) Do you feel that losing weight has exposed something in you that the fat was covering up and which you are subconsciously trying to re-cover? Until you find out why you prefer to be heavier you are going to struggle for sure.
4) Are you over-stressed? Trying to fast when your life is full of stress might not be such a good idea...but beware of making excuses, if your life is full of stress maybe you need to address the sources of stress rather than stop fasting. Again, modifying the fast so you are still doing it but less severely might be the answer here.
5) Are you just a bit bored of the program now the initial excitement has worn off? Remind yourself of all the benefits of fasting and why you started it in the first place. Try playing with different fasting methods to bring some variety to your life. Maybe try mentoring a newbie, when you give advice to them likely you will be encouraging yourself at the same time!
6) Allow yourself to be variable...some fast days are harder than others, just because you found Monday's fast hard, does not mean that Thursday's fast will be. Try to think about why Monday's fast was hard...did you over-eat high carb foods on Sunday night? Was Monday a particularly stressful day at work? Did you just get back from holiday and your brain has got into the habit of thinking that daily ice creams and cocktails is normal? Now you know why Monday was hard, you can go into Thursday's fast expecting it to be trouble-free - and it probably will be!

I expect you could add several more important questions to this list!

Well done@Hazelnut20 on your achievement so far!!! The answer to the $64 million question? I don't think there is an answer to that, I wish I knew it too! I am in maintenance now and staying here is hard work at times. All I do though is look at old photos of myself (the large variety), re-read the success stories on here, read the internet about fasting and 5:2 'til it comes out of my ears, chat away on here and tell myself over and over what I should do. I think it's all about re-educating yourself and a bit of self brainwashing!
Keeping in the swing of it seems to be key.

Crickey that all sounds like me! There is a tiny voice saying "Grandmas should be a bit cuddly-round shouldn't they?" Perhaps if I turn my head quick enough I'll catch sight of that little red demon perched on my left shoulder :0@
It's got to be all about good health for me, and I am heaps healthier than I've been for well, decades really. Some days are hopeless but they get less as I get to grips with the 16/8 + no gluten nor sugar routine and today is a happy day as I'm 400g down too :0)
Many thanks Caro for all your supremely helpful and sensible advice.

A very apt and thought -provoking post @Hazelnut20 given the new Returners' Tent.
In my humble opinion, just as there are many reasons why people gain weight and factors involved, there are equally as many reasons why some people seemingly sabotage all their hard efforts by regaining the weight and in some cases end up even heavier than they were initially.
@carorees has explained it all beautifully but I would just like to emphasise the psychological aspects of losing weight. Many women especially have poor body image, see only their faults and not their good points and may actually struggle adjusting to receiving compliments and admiring looks once their figures start to reduce. Somehow we even feel that we don't 'deserve' to be slim, sexy, attractive, gorgeous and find these feelings very hard to come to terms with and put weight back on as a sort of safety blanket.
Maybe actually going a few pounds under target weight gives us the leeway to have a blow out (or two!) without falling off the wagon completely, but we all know that reaching maintenance is not the end of the journey. Perhaps that has been your downfall in that you think I've done it now, no need to watch what I eat any more and before you know it you're back where you started!
Constant vigilance is the key to staying slim but it is so worth it. We all deserve to feel good about ourselves and to be the healthiest weight for us individually and to reap the benefits of IF for as long as possible.
Sorry for long rambling post!

I think you have to come to terms with the fact you cannot eat and live how you have done in the past if you want to keep the weight off. That's why I prefere to sat way of eating /life rather than diet. I know I will get bored with it at some point but I also know I don't want high blood pressure and diabetes which both run in the family. I am hoping that will keep me on the right path.

The issue for me is that I am still having trouble not overindulging on most non-fast days. I am fine all day but once evening is here... I know lots of things I could/should do to help but I don't do them.

I have tried to work out why I am eating when I am not hungry. I think it is mainly a bad habit, and the immediate pleasure of nice tasting food as a reward/comfort. Also knowing that anything I gain I can lose by fasting - as has been proved by the last 6 months. But this is NOT healthy eating.

Also, I find that fasting is difficult if I haven't overindulged the day before. I have wondered elsewhere if my relatively low BMI may be a contributor to that?? As indicated by my solstice challenge, I really would like to manage my weight through mindful eating with less need for fast days (though would aim for 16:8 most days, which I often do as a consequence of not having breakfast most days anyway).

Not sure if this is totally on topic, but am interested in any comments.

(I do note Brand-ie's comment, which was posted while I was writing this, that we need to come to terms with not being able to eat the way we did before and keep weight off. )

A superbly thought out post as usual @carorees - many thanks for your insight.

I have just lost my detailed reply to you! Think the login times itself out - would that be right? I started posting and then a friend called round for coffee (no biscuits!) - when she left, I resumed posting, hit the preview button......and there it was.....gone Grrrr....

The gist of what I wanted to say was: it seems to me the crux of the matter is mindful as opposed to mindless eating. That, plus a constant awareness of consequences. In the past, I have always adopted the "I don't care" approach to eating. No amount of food & treats could ever fill the emotional void that I have attempted to fill anyway - but the real trouble is, I am not remotely in the habit of speculation and self-analysis. That probably says something in itself.

Your question about what purpose does being overweight serve, resonated strongly with me. I don't have the answer yet, though there undoubtedly is one, but as a reasonably intelligent woman, I can't get my head around why I would "willingly" swap all the very positive aspects of weightloss and increased health...with all the negatives I experience when I am overweight - very low self-esteem, depression, feelings of worthlessness, etc etc. Although I am nowhere near my target weight, so technically should be super-motivated to continue, the doubts seem to have crept in a bit over the past fortnight and it has been a struggle to eat mindfully. Also, since putting on the 6lbs from my mini-break, my mood has plummeted. I totally believe that this is linked to eating relative junk & drinking too much that week - because since starting 5:2 my mood has sky-rocketed. Some days I felt completely high on life....and it was a fantastic feeling for a change - I saw the funny side of things, danced around the kitchen...& even started to quite like myself & have feelings of pride in what I had achieved. All that seems to have slipped of late, & I miss it.

Just thought I'd add all this to the mix. Many thanks to everyone who is contributing to this thread - I really appreciate everyone's thoughts xx

Brilliant question @hazelnut20

As one of the said gang that's fallen off the wagon, that's precisley what we'll hopefully figure out this time round.
However for what it's worth I do think where I went wrong was that I drifted away from fasting completely.
I think if you're struggling or disatisfied with rate of weight loss you need to keep with some form of fasting and keep tweaking till you get the balance right.

You've done incredibly well so far,so I hope you can continue as successfully and continue to act, as so many others here do, as an inspiration to us re-starters.
After all there's a lot more of you than there are of us

A lot of what you say resonates strongly with me Hazelnut - why would I swap all the positives of weighing less for all the negatives of weighing more. I certainly don't think I want to be fat for ANY reason and have no trouble accepting compliments!!

I have also put on 3kgs (6 lbs) in a few days, but have lost it within a week through fasting - most of the weight gain is water I think, retained due to the excess carbs I understand. Are you able to use fasts to get rid of those quick gains? That is, does that strategy work for you?

Overcoming habits of a lifetime is not easy - I don't need to tell anyone that, I know. Sorry I don't have any suggestions for you...

Hi , [tag]hazelnut20[/tag], what a great pensive string! I have many thoughts about it, but I don't think I can do justice to them all right now, it's already late. But I do feel for you!! You say you're not in the habit of self-reflection - that may be true, but you certainly have a gift and a calling for it, if I may be so bold. Your identity just needs to catch up with the rest of you on that topic!

As for "immunising" (my words) ourselves against falling off the wagon, I suspect that mightn't be possible or even desirable. All we can do is bring our awareness and our self-love with us to the challenges that life brings, and so when we do inevitably fall off, we have enough of these things, as well as love and support from the world, to clamber back on again as soon as possible, however inelegantly.

Reading your deep thoughts makes me think of a great book I'm reading at the moment, on vulnerability & shame resilience, by Brene (pronounced "Brennay" I think) Brown, called "daring greatly: how the courage to be vulnerable transforms the way we live, love, parent and lead" - she has also done 2 TED talks. Well worth a look and a ponder!

Thinking of all of us who sometimes need to hold onto the wagon by our teeth!

Very very interesting.i have been losing and regaining 3or 4kilos for years and years.i am not overweight ,like sassy my bmi I low but I want to be thinner.so I struggle and struggle and finally lose the weight ,but then over time it comes back
So here's my theory.
We like the process
We like having something to work towards
A club to belong to
A group to identify with
A conversation
How many women love to talk diets
So when we lose the weight we lose the conversation,the pastime ,the hobby
Just a thought.

So when we lose the weight we lose the conversation,the pastime ,the hobby
Just a thought.

So one good idea is to keep seeing yourself as a 'fast day member' even if not really fasting at the moment. The first three months of this year I did not fast (I was at the lower limit of my weight), but stayed involved with the forum and still considering myself as a 5:2 faster. It is really a way of life and not a temporary strategy to loose weight or gain health

For me it was forget dieting, sign up for a way of life.
9.5 months of maintaining show me that committing to a WOL and using fasting or eating windows to my advantage, for me at least, is the way to go. By the time my excitement over smaller, nicer clothes had died down and the compliments slowed I was used to eating this way and have it be 'the norm'.
Also keep using the forum. Why would you not with all the wonderful people and constant entertainment/education on here? It's a great place to be and if you're having a bad time you will possibly find encouragement and support just when you need it most.