The FastDay Forum

Hello.
I hope you all will forgive me for this long post but I've no one to talk to and I'm feeling very low.

I was a fat child. I've never told any one that before and I've burnt every single photo. My mother stuffed me with food to the point of bursting and got very angry if I ever refused or left any of her (wonderful) cooking. At the same time she let me know how embarrassed she was to have an ugly fat daughter.
Eventually when I left home I lost the weight and for most of my adult life I've been around 8st 3lbs. I'm 5ft 3" with very small bones and although photos show that I always looked slim I never felt it. I always thought I was too fat.
Over the last couple of years (I'm 62) my weight crept up a bit and I gained a significant belly. Last August I watched the Horizon programme and loved the science behind it so my DH and I started 5:2. I was 8st 12lbs, he was 15st 7lbs. He's lost the 2 stone he was aiming for and is now happy on 6:1 - for life he says. I lost my 9lbs but the weight kept dropping off. After Christmas I went to 6:1 and then to one 18 hour fast a week with a proper evening meal but I couldn't stabilise. At my lowest I was 7st 3lbs.
I'm now off fasting completely and I'm up to 7st 7lbs but it's still underweight - my BMI is below 19 - so I have to keep gaining. It's so counter-intuitive after a lifetime of watching what I eat. Yesterday I had some photographs taken and frightened myself - I look so gaunt and ill. I can't talk to my husband because he is so upset about how thin I am. I hide under lots of clothes (thank goodness for the cold weather) and lie about my weight.
Thank you for "listening".

So you have succeeded really, even if you overshot a little. Perhaps your history means your feed days are a little low on calories but if you've overdone it then stepping back makes sense.

At least now you know exactly what to do if you need to pull the weight back again.

Oh lulu, big hugs to you. Your health is the most important thing and you must do whatever is necessary to stay healthy. I'm sure someone with knowledge of 5:2 will give you good advice on what to do, unfortunately I'm new to this and can't but stay on the forum and you'll get loads of support I'm sure x

Hello Lulu,

There were some things that went through my mind when reading your post.
- Do you feel healthy?
- Do you eat enough on your feed days?
- Did you already go to a doctor to ask for medical advise because it is strange that you keep losing weight?

I wish you all the best and do what feels good for you, not for anyone else!

Sandy

I think you're allowed to stop now!

Can empathise lots, my Mum can moan at me for not eating, that I'm fat and for dieting all in the same sentence. She's still complaining that I gave up sugar in tea (when I was 16) and I'm now 42. It's a very strong influence that never goes away.

I was also saying I wish I had known I was thin at 9 stone...I feel thinner at 14 stone because I'm loved now and it really is all about how you feel, not how you look!

I think you need someone to talk to as you sound like you might have some depression. Don't hide under clothes, be out and proud. Say to everyone, I'm a bit too thin but I'm eating and sorting it!

Don't try to eat too much, just up the fat content of what you're eating so that it's more bang for the buck. And don't rush to put the weight on, just try to find an equilibrium. Don't fast any more either.

Rather than focus on food, time to address some long suppressed issues. Here is a website but maybe someone like Marlathome can help too??

http://www.llttf.com/

Hi Lulu, thanks so much for your very brave post, one of the most important functions of this forum is to provide an outlet in these sorts of difficult situations where it can be hard to speak to nearest and dearest.

You've obviously done very well through your life maintaining a good weight after being overweight as a child. You just got a bit carried away with 5:2! You are absolutely right of course to have stopped and to be aiming to put some weight back on.

Have you been for a check up? If not, it would be a good idea, just to make sure...

[carorees]

Yes I agree with all the above.

If you are still losing despite eating more and especially if you are not feeling well in yourself you should go for a check up.

You can still get many of the benefits of fasting by trying to ensure you have a 12 hour overnight fast on most days.

Thank you for telling us about your situation - we're here to support you.

Oh my! I know that you wrote this post for totally different reasons but may I say that it is sooooo encouraging for us who do this to lose weight?
I kept reading and reading and I couldn't believe what you're saying!!!
On the other hand, if on your 5 days you eat a lot and still lose weight, then perhaps seeing your doctor is not a bad idea. maybe your thyroid went hyper? Nothing to worry about, just to make sure that everything works nicely and that you are just one of the lucky ones who eat and lose weight (or don't gain).

many years ago I went slimming world and lost 3 and a half stone I reached my gold star weight as they used to call it ,I too carried on losing and I didn't want to ,I started eating more and more after about 3 months the weight about turned and I have gradually put it on over the years, I did have loads of blood test at the time and all were normal so this can sometimes happen I think

[carorees]

That's interesting Carol. Shows we have to monitor what is happening all the time!

Thank you for all the messages of support everyone. Everyone at home is out for the day and I was feeling sooo low. I think I'm quite healthy - I had a check up recently and everything was normal except my weight and my cholesterol which was high but not a problem because the ratio was good (I also know now not to have cholesterol tested after fasting). Physically I feel ok - just low in mood, cold and tired a lot of the time. I'll carry on eating normally and hope to gradually get back up to "fighting weight". I rarely eat after my evening meal Carolees so even on 3 meals a day I usually have a 12 hour fast.

Hi Lulu, your post rang warning bells for me and my immediate thought was 'eating disorder'. I hope I'm wrong there but is there some possibility that a combination of a troubled past with food and the impulse to fast has made you go to extremes in curbing your food intake? I was 7st 7 once (5ft 2) and was very thin indeed. It was as a result of a health food kick I had going on. Be careful hun, maybe factor in some healthy snacks between meals such as dates, nuts, avocado etc to put some weight back on. Keep us updated, hugs x.

Lulu That all sounds really tough. I identify with a lot of what you wrote, and it's hard stuff. I hope you feel better for posting and for getting some support. It's good you recognise that all is not well and that you're doing something to tackle it.

I've been there too with the overweight, then losing (too much), not really liking losing too much, and hating all the comments (ranging from concern to 'oh I wish I could do that too'). If you're not losing weight in a healthy and happy way, you're not going to be healthy and happy.

I hope things continue to get better for you, and you start to feel healthier emotionally and physically.

Hi Lulu, I would agree with the last poster that maybe adding some good fats like avocado and nuts would be a really good thing. Also, getting out and being physical to stoke up your appetite might help. The feeling cold, tired, and kind of down make me remember when I was a looot younger and did the early version of Atkins (only protein, no fats or veggies). I lost a lot of weight (even though I didn't really need to lose any) and felt like you describe. At 5'3" and small-boned, another 5-7lbs should help you feel better. Best of luck.

Hi Lulu, sounds like you are having a tough time
Just wanted to chime in on the advice to get a check up. The test your doctor takes are (or should be...) targeted - so if you didn't report this particular problem at the time of the check up, not all test necessary to exclude medical causes for your sustained weight loss would have been taken. As Carol reported, this could well be a "normal" side effect of the fasting, but it is better to make sure.
Good luck! Keep us posted!