The FastDay Forum

Dinner is in the oven........
Chicken breast stuffed with Brie, mushrooms, garlic and olives and wrapped with bacon medallions served with fried mushrooms. I am not sure how long this will keep me going for, but it'll be an early night if things don't go well

Today I almost gave up on my fast day. I decided I wouldn't succeed as I was getting so upset and stressed and would 'need' to eat!
First issue occurred at 8am when the electrician casually announced he would just pop up to my bedroom to isolate the solar panels! The only room in our house which no one is allowed into, is our bedroom. I need a sanctuary and here was a complete stranger wanting access. It took half an hour and lots of tears (yes I realise it may be seen as an overreaction, but in a house overrun with these professionals and work men, I need somewhere to escape to!)
The next issue is that we were expecting the hoist installers, but the electricity was going off for 6 hours!
The hoist people didn't turn up until 11am and had forgotten the 4 way hoist pod for Ka's bedroom.
After 2 hours of hoist blokes doing very little, they announced that they were unable to fit the hoist we've waited for 2 years and 8 months to have fitted!!!
Ka's OT, OT manager and adaptations bloke from council were all incommunicado and my husband was out on an errand. I excused myself to go off and have a weep then rang OH to come home and sort it all out.
It took from 1pm until 6pm to organise getting a quote for a whole new hoisting system. It will be ordered tomorrow, but will take 3-6 weeks to arrive, it'll need fitting and building repairs need to be made afterwards. Not a big issue after 32 months waiting, except that ka is having major orthopaedic surgery in 4 weeks and we can't bring her home from hospital until it's all completed!
How bad is it that I almost turned to food as a crutch?
I am hoping that my breakthrough is that I realised in time. Even though I knew that I was justifying why I was going to leave it for today, I was still incredibly close!
Instead, it was 6pm before things were 'sorted' and the workmen had left, so I'd come that far and it would've been a shame to give up then. I took my daughter shopping and bought fish and salad for us, even though OH had me buy him a pizza!
I'm hoping I'm turning a corner, but think I may have a way to go yet x

[carorees]

Wow Karen, you really had an awful day...I'm so impressed that you didn't crumble. No-one would have had any cause you criticise you if you had, which makes your achievement even more impressive.

Here's hoping that the new system arrives early and is installed smoothly.

Karen you are amazing. I am so impressed reading your posts here. I searched you out after you said you have the same problem as me with the tracker after re-starting the fast diet.
We do have many similar issues although I am a little older than you (50- thats the first time I have actually admitted to that hahaha!)
It seems that stress is our main trigger! mine when I am looking after my mother (in another country) as she has severe arthritis and all the complications with that. I also have the Paul Mckenna book on my shelf, Although I did read it when looking after my mother as a means to get to sleep! hence I have not acted on it at all hahaha
You are definitely doing the right thing in coming back to the fasting way of life but don't worry if OH is not in this with you as I promise you, you can do this.
My OH has never needed to diet in his life, he got the good genes from his grandfather and has only put on 2 kilo in the 20 years that I have know him and he can eat everything and anything! He also does not understand dieting/going to the gym etc and so I cannot discuss this with him (he has seen me yo-yo too many times!) so now I try to cook the same meal where possible but take out all the sabotage stuff from my plate, carbs, sugar etc) You have to get a bit creative but it works most of the time. I also do not diet/fast at the week-ends so that makes things much easier, although I try not to go overboard!
We have one advantage over anyone else starting out on the fasting journey.....We know it works!
We just need to find our key to get back into the rhythm of losing again and then it will be much easier to stick with it as we know how hard it is the 2nd time around. This time when we hit our targets we will DEFINITELY MAINTAIN our weight successfully with 5:2!!
Wishing you every success with your journey!

You are right @romany05, we do know this works!
My OH has told me I need to stop obsessing over my weight and that I think I'm fat. He said that I'm not fat, my waist measurement is half of my height and I've still got my hourglass (I'm pretty lucky, I suppose, in that I do tend to keep the hourglass when I get fat, it's just my boobs and bum go up in proportion to my waist lol)
I'm wearing my size 12 dresses and jeans again (though I have just bought a size 14 tunic as I need more room around the shoulders for working in)
I would like to say I'm happy as I am, but being the ever mindful self critic, I'm not. My BMI is still a lot higher than is healthy, but I'm not so worried about that number. I need to be back in the low 11s again. I liked that number. So I will keep plodding on, back on the 5:2 (not 4:3) I will eat more mindfully and read that Paul McKenna book (if I can remember where I put it!)
Just as an afterthought - who else believes we should get a free download if we buy the hard copy of a book?
xxx xxx

I am struggling a bit today. I don't really know what I'm doing or why!
Because I'm not actually aiming for a healthy BMI, (after loads of working out last year, around 27 should be about right for me) I am trying to justify not bothering! I think I'm really gutted about not losing yesterday after putting 3 fasts in and not going over my TDEE on other days! I'd been desparate to get into 11s and losing not even a gram is nasty!
I will carry on this week and hope that next weeks weigh in is more friendly!
I know I've eaten cr@p but I did stay in my cals. I will not eat crisps this week or white bread and see if that helps. I am already missing crisps and it was only Wednesday since I had loads!
I may have a carb addiction

Don't lose heart. It's only 3 fasts. I can take a while to kick in as you know. Just keep going, and stick to your TDEE. You do sound like you need to set yourself an objective though. Just a small one to keep you focused over the next few weeks.

@rawkaren, I think I do need a small goal to keep mpe focused, the 14lb springy challenge is too big right now. I want to be under 12 stone before my daughters surgery on 31 July. I also want to still be under 12 stone when we get home the following week!
I hereby pledge to not eat crisps this week (someone at target club was eating monster munch and I had a mini argument in my head that they were a savoury snack and not crisps. But I concluded they were crisps and didn't ask for one )
I will also not eat white bread. I think I tried to do too much and my head caved and did none of it Once I'm in the habit of not turning to crisps and toast for snacks, I will have a look at what else I'll change, most likely white pasta for green/wholemeal as I already only eat wholemeal rice (except for risotto)
We have a bit of a week again.
Meeting tomorrow to decide whether my daughter can attend the local respite centre when hers is closed next month.
Tuesday I'm working first thing, meeting with new hoist manufacturer and counselling pm, but ka in respite Tuesday night so Hoping to get away in camper.
Wednesday - stairlift refitted - oh bugger! That means we can't go away and hospital to X-Ray my thumb
Thursday builder refitting living room door frame and door.
Friday - trip up to Exeter to check out possible new target rifle after getting weighed

I have moaned and whinged about not losing weight this week, BUT I have noticed in the mirror that my tummy is a bit smaller and that's my main reason for doing this.
I know 5:2 has health benefits, but I'm fairly complacent in the fact I'm fairly healthy. But following this now should help prevent issues in the future (I wish I'd discovered 5:2 10 years ago)

I wonder whether losing a couple more lb will stop the tracker being a meanie? It's now June 2017 til I lose my remaining 11lb

I've still not eaten any crisps, though it's been harder than I'd thought. I'm now very conscious of how much I nibble when preparing kerrianne's meals
I've had no bread since Friday and no white bread since the previous week!
I fasted yesterday and today. I can't remember doing a B2B before! I am now very hungry and have eaten dinner. As it was a stir fry, it was pretty low in cals and I've got 200cals left.
I have a frys peppermint cream or pecans and dates. Hmmmmm......which to have?
Today's good news is that
ka has been allocated a place at our chosen respite centre for when her current one is closed
Ka's new hoisting equipment will be fitted on 23 July and they'll sort out the funding for it between themselves
Bad news is that we have joiner coming to fit living room door Thursday, but Ka's school on strike so she'll be home until 2. Hopefully she'll like him and not scream til he leaves.
I've just eaten 37g pecans and dates and will have a couple of bits of chocolate, but I'm still not bookkeeping tonight
I've found a lovely dress, but not sure if it'd suit me, or that I'd wear it.
http://www.carolinadressroom.co.uk/vint ... 7738-p.asp
Will think about it tonight!

Why on earth do I sabotage myself?
I did a B2B sun/mon. Was doing ok yesterday until I scoffed the lions share of a tub of Hagen daas salted caramel!
Today has also been bad and I've just been breaking off chunks of cheese from the block and scoffing them with water biscuits!
Just grrrrrrr!
We have beef in the oven for tea, but we've not been shopping, so it'll be with whatever I find in the fridge.
Is there a way of pulling this back? Will drinking lots of water help as I'm now quite bloated, or will it make matters worse.
I'm really disappointed in myself :-/
We have traced back the start of today's munching to when I found out the workmen aren't using the existing holes to fit the stairlift, they've moved all the uprights to slightly different places and nonchanantly (sp? Or just a made up word?) told me rubbing a nice cube over the flattened carpet will puff it back up! I don't like one of the workmen and knowing he was coming today already had me wound up last night, so may explain the ice cream fest!
I was also told today that the school transport wasn't going to be as planned. Instead of kerrianne being the last one collected on a morning and first dropped of on an evening, it was the complete reverse and she'd be on the bus for well over an hour each way! This isn't what had been commissioned, so they're now looking into changing things around - yet more uncertainty!
There's a joiner coming tomorrow to fit a doorframe and make a door to fit, but the teachers strike means ka will be home whilst work is being done. This could make for an interesting day.
BUT we are dropping her to the respite centre at 1.30 and she's away for the weekend. I am determined to get at least one night in the camper this weekend. I don't care whether or not it's raining!
We still have to have the bathroom ripped out and the new one installed, the upstairs hoist ripped out on 22nd, new one installed on 23rd and the two upstairs doorframes and doors fitted on 24th and 25th.
I have now written a list and am crossing stuff off to see that things are progressing.
I just need to breathe and let it all happen xxx xxx

It's weigh day today, but we are at mil house and I don't know what to do! I'd like to pop into wadebridge and get weighed in boots (if they've got scales) failing that, do I use the home scales? I'm not sure his accurate they are, but waiting another week will be tough! In honesty, I'm not feeling any lighter or slimmer

Dear karenm,
I hope you are getting through all your tremendous upheaval in good heart. Mindfulness and staying focused might help (also might be a pain in the ass) but I admire your firm fasting stance in the face of surrounding chaos.
One day at a time m'dear {{{+}}}

Thankyou @azurebluexxx xxx

I appear to have lost 2lb this week, but am not too sure how accurate that is due to using the MILs scales instead of the boots ones.
I will just keep on and see what the scales show next week.
What is a little bit worrying is how upset I got when I found there were no scales for me to get weighed on in town. Hubby told me not to worry and I could give this week a miss. He soon heard the multitude of reasons I came up with as to why that wasn't the case.
He ended up suggesting his mums to shut me up.
This wouldn't be so hard if he was supportive, but he thinks I should pack it in. He isn't dieting or watching what he eats, which is a bit frustrating as he could do with being more careful. But that's his problem. It's only my problem as he would rather I wasn't being careful!
Ah well.
Onwards and downwards

We stayed at MILs last night (here again tonight too!) We went up to visit Bude, which was a first for me and OH. I had strawberries and yoghurt for breakfast, kiddies portion of lasagne verde for lunch, Indian takeaway (small portion) for a late dinner and only had 1400cals maximum! I'm well chuffed as it proves I can have a fabulous day and not eat like a pig. I've not snacked all day and I've drunk lots of water.
1 good day down and looking forward to tomorrow's non fast day (fasting mon and Thursday this week)
I am feeling more in control today. Kerrianne is in respite until Monday (longest ever stay away and probably her last weekend) There were a couple of issues earlier including the wheel falling off her wheelchair, but I didn't get stressed or upset, just made phonecalls and got it all sorted! Feeling quite pleased with myself

[janeg]

Glad things seem to be settling down a wee bit [Tag]Karenm[/[tag]. It sounds like you are under an enormous amount of strain. I take my hat off to you far getting through it and keeping on fasting.
Do you measure yourself? that might help with the lack of access to the scales, and also to the disappointment if the scale numbers don't shift. Often, our bodies take to rearranging themselves without any weight going. You saw it with your flatter tum.
Also, stress releases hormones that make the body hang on to the weight, so it is counterproductive to seeing the scales go down. Another good reason to try and take a step back and a big deep breathe when things aren't going as well as they could be.
Although hubs isn't being supportive, you are not alone. We are with you, holding your hand, celebrating your triumphs, commiserating with the bits that aren't going so well and rooting for you!
and you are one strong woman